That’s right, folks, you heard it here first. And for those a little slow in the audience, you are probably the kind of people who happily forward on these kinds of spawn you receive from friends or strangers equally!

What is most troubling about this phenomenon is that people seemingly turn into lemmings when confronted by a chain letter that says in big, intimidating letters “FORWARD ME TO EVERYONE IN YOUR ADDRESSBOOK OR DOOM WILL FALL ON YOUR HOUSE!” Still under the mesmerising spell of these simple words, the sender doesn’t actually *read* through the contents to assure that there is some truth in the words. He or she just happily assumes that “it must be true, since its on the Internet.”

Case in point, today. I’ll actually clean this one up, since the amount of addresses, quote indentations and corporate email disclaimers included is just scary:

IT HAS BEEN CALCULATED THAT IF EVERYONE IN GREAT BRITAIN OR SOUTH
AFRICA DID NOT PURCHASE A DROP OF PETROL FOR ONE DAY AND ALL AT
THE SAME TIME, THE OIL COMPANIES WOULD CHOKE ON THEIR STOCKPILES.
AT THE SAME TIME IT WOULD HIT THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY WITH A NET LOSS
OF OVER 4.6 BILLION POUNDS WHICH AFFECTS THE BOTTOM LINES OF THE
OIL COMPANIES.

THEREFORE MAY 19TH HAS BEEN FORMALLY DECLARED “STICK IT UP THEIR
BEHIND “DAY AND THE PEOPLE OF THIS NATION SHOULD NOT BUY A SINGLE
DROP OF PETROL THAT DAY.

THE ONLY WAY THIS CAN BE DONE IS IF YOU FORWARD THIS E-MAIL TO AS
MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN AND AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN TO GET THE WORD OUT.

WAITING ON THIS GOVERNMENT TO STEP IN AND CONTROL THE PRICES IS NOT
GOING TO HAPPEN. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE REDUCTION AND CONTROL IN PRICES
THAT THE ARAB NATIONS PROMISED A FORTNIGHT AGO?

REMEMBER ONE THING, NOT ONLY IS THE PRICE OF PETROL GOING UP BUT AT
THE SAME TIME AIRLINES ARE FORCED TO RAISE THEIR PRICES, TRUCKING
COMPANIES ARE FORCED TO RAISE THEIR PRICES WHICH EFFECTS PRICES ON
EVERYTHING THAT IS SHIPPED. THINGS LIKE FOOD, CLOTHING, BUILDING
MATERIALS, MEDICAL SUPPLIES ETC.

WHO PAYS IN THE END? WE DO!

WE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. IF THEY DON’T GET THE MESSAGE AFTER ONE
DAY, WE WILL DO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN. SO DO YOUR PART AND SPREAD THE
WORD.

FORWARD THIS EMAIL TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW. MARK YOUR CALENDARS AND
MAKE MAY 19TH A DAY THAT THE CITIZENS OF GREAT BRITAIN AND SOUTH
AFRICA SAY “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH”

I think this must be the stupidest, worst-thought-out idea in a long while. What kind of lunatic makes maths and argues like this? The fact that everyone skips a day filling up with petrol doesn’t mean you don’t need petrol for the day — it simply means that you’ll delay filling up by a day. The oil company will still get your money, whether you like it or not.

And “South Africa” was so obviously tacked on to a message originally intended for British readers.

Idiots.